Leaving the city for a small town: it wasn’t a smooth ride

Yesterday, I read an article titled "Chasing the Island Dream” written by my colleague Michelle for The Jakarta Post. She delved into the growing trend of people relocating to idyllic islands like Bali or Lombok, lured by the promise of a laid-back lifestyle. However, she revealed that transforming these beautiful islands into a true home is far from easy.

In that article, one of the sources said, “I don’t think I had spiritual connection with the island. We are not bound by spirits. It felt like a contract. Transactional.” It took her years to truly feel at home in Bali, embracing not just its lifestyle but also the way people work there.

This statement struck me. In 2022, I made a big move, buying a house and leaving Bandung City for Tangerang Regency.

Yet, I still feel disconnected from the place where I live now. Why? Maybe it’s the dusty, bumpy roads from trucks hauling rocks, or the unsightly piles of trash I pass by daily. It may be the lack of amenities, like a decent supermarket.

I remember once searching for rice paper for Vietnamese spring rolls, only to be told by a local vendor, “Only lumpia wrappers sell here. My business wouldn’t survive selling that!”

This makes me think that I’ll eventually return to Bandung and find a place that truly feels like home.

In Michelle’s article, she writes crucial questions for those considering island life: Why here? Why this place? What does it mean to you, and how can you contribute to it?

Although I am not living island life, I try to answer it.

I chose Tangerang for its affordability and closeness to Jakarta, hoping to finally end the long-distance relationship with my family. But for now, Tangerang feels more like a temporary resting place, somewhere to lay my head at night.

But how can I make Tangerang feel like home?

Then, I flashed back to when I started a new job years ago. Adjusting isn’t always immediate; sometimes, it takes countless interactions with colleagues to truly settle in.

What made me comfortable at the office wasn’t the fancy facilities but the people — the ones who valued differences, fostered openness, and shared the same jokes. Even the daily grind of a long commute became more bearable with supportive colleagues who brightened my day.

Reflecting on how to make Tangerang feel like home, I realize that the answer might be to open myself up more to connect with people or a community that shares those values. I realize that building a life in small town isn’t just about enjoying the facilities or the view in that area; it’s about engaging and connecting with the people around us.